A little more than I can give,..

I've been meaning to post another entry, but I just can't seem to find the time (and possibly the inspiration). So, anyways, I'll be posting about the weekend sometime tomorrow. Preferably not late tomorrow night.

I just wasted ten seconds of your life...

What a wonderful way for spring break to start.

You know, that time generally thought of as a warm week of freedom for the heavily-burdened student? Yeah, what a joke. It's been precipitating since yesterday afternoon. First it was rain, then it became sleet this afternoon, now it's snowing. I want it to go away. Just go away. I had all sorts of outside plans today, but due to the weather, most of them were dispensed with; I shriveled up and took a nap instead.

I did get out to Social Security today, as one of the potential future dwellings I'm considering needed verification of my SSN before they could check my credit. Both the woman on the phone and the woman behind the desk responded like I was crazy when I said I only wanted the paper that said what my number was.

Let's see... I was thinking about getting a haircut today. I wanted to do laundry. I did get spend a little time cleaning my room. I wanted to get my oil changed. This is an abridged list.

Furthermore on the topic of spring break, where's the break? Between the first three days after the break, I have 2 papers due and three tests to take. I believe I'll be busy writing and reading all week. Just, not tomorrow...

Because tomorrow I'll be out and about from 7:30am until after 11:00pm. Ledos is having some sort of alcohol training thing, and it has to take place (largely) outside of work hours as most of our staff will be there. Once that ends, I'll be working a double shift. Since De closes, I have a feeling I'll be there to close as well.

I had hoped that by the time I finished writing about my life, I'd have come up with something interesting, important, or clever to say. Unfortunately not.

I've dug up miles and miles of sand
Searching for something I can't see
And I've just got bruised and battered hands
And a brand new void inside of me
Complete with walls I did create
From all the earth that I've displaced
A mess that I have made from what
I've just let pile and pile up

The older I get, Maybe I'll get over it...

Tonight was interesting. I don't know why, it just was.

Ang was unable to find a third person in replacement of Ali, so it was just her and me most of the night. Hillary helped, but she opened and was already scheduled to close on counter, so she couldn't stay on waitstaff forever. Ang too wasn't much interested in taking tables for long, so I spent much of the night paroling the whole dining room, taking some 20 tables and making some $120.

I'd have been out in the 10:45pm range if I had really tried, but I decided to chill and watch some Futurama while rolling silverware. Then, after the silverware in front of me was gone, I preceded to watch more Futurama while not doing anything else. I wasn't exactly holding anyone else up, as by the time I left at 11:30pm, Ren, Matt, and Marty were all still hanging around. They're probably still there now.

When I stepped outside, I immediately wished I had left earlier; what a wonderful night it was. I rolled down the windows and had a lovely drive home, including running into 4 police cars. The air was so nice. It always makes me think about everywhere I could drive to. I had over $400 in my pocket, and I could have gassed up and driven pretty much anywhere. I always get weird when I feel free like that. I think about all the situations I could get into, how I tie myself down to a job, school, and people when I really don't have to, and what I would do if I really could do anything.

I can't wait to really be free from the long-applied restraints of childhood that still control me. It's times like these that I realize just how strong they still are. One of these days, everything that restrains me will be self-created. Is that freedom enough?

I dropped by my fianceé's house and found Hanna leaving and someone turning all the lights out. I still got to see De, but only for a second. It was nice nonetheless. Now here I am, home, sleepless, with a paper to finish that's due at 10:00am, and a head full of thoughts about everything and anything else. Tim's in PA overnight. I'm all alone with my thoughts. Somebody save me...

Could I be lost, could I disappear
Could I be lost, would you find me here
Could I be lost in a secret place
Could I rest in the shadow of your face

I have an announcement to make...

This is a simple post, with the simple task of alerting anyone who wanders by that I will attempt to write here every so often. Feel free to stop by as you wish and see how I'm doing.

Thank you. :-P

Let it go...

What can I say? I've not been here to write. Do I need to apologize? Have I done anything wrong? Well, yes I have, but that's unrelated.

I'm here now because I have nothing left to do. This doesn't, and never has, had to make sense to you the reader. I'm sure I would be content to type gibberish here in my current state of mind. Maybe that's what I'm doing.

Where am I? Good question. I am lost in the past and the future. I ended up not taking classes this semester, making it a full year since I've had a full course load. I don't know why this happened, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it. It is my plan to take a few classes over the summer to make up for this. Sorry Tim, no summer trips for me. The apartment is nominally clean, as I cooked a day-after valentine's day meal for my girlfriend yesterday. I've had some pretty good times with her recently. Too good perhaps, as now I will miss her while we are both separately busy. It's tough taking the bad with the good.

I have more organizing and fixing of things to do in the near future, I have laundry to do... Lots of it! I'm thinking I should look for a few more hours of work per week. I'm not going to find that at Ledo's, so who knows what will happen. Many of the personal habits that I have been trying to... well... make habits are still sitting on my "to do" list as I type. "The wind blows hard, the climb is slow", I guess.

Talkity talk talkity talk talk talk yak... What does one have to do to make himself "want" something anyway?

Oh look, I have a commenter. Hi Jane!